Not Good Enough vs Just Right

As hard as I try to convince myself otherwise, there are going to be some days in which I can't succeed like I want to; success won't look like I envision. I won't be able to make my life look like what I think it should. It will be exhaustion and low-grade fever and pain that's hard to bear.

It will be a cottage full of Mama Bear and Baby Bears in pajamas at nearly 3 p.m.

That's chronic pain for you. That's chronic illness.

It will also be a chance to slow down that we wouldn't otherwise take; a chance to wear fuzzy pink slippers and bathrobes and pile into a big bed that's just the right size and read a big pile of storybooks.

It will be time to learn some Spanish. Time to discuss manners, sibling relationships, trying new foods, the science in the natural world.

It will be time for cuddling close -- for a 4 year-old head on my shoulder, and a 7 year-old hand, tanned brown from summer sun, resting on me.

It will be time slowed down.

And this evening when Papa Bear comes home from work, the house may not be clean, the table may have gone unused for schooling, but we will be calm and loving, and we will have learned and grown today, and we will be a little bit closer for this time we told to slow down and the hours we cuddled close and knit our hearts together.

Isn't that the success I envision?

Children's Literature We Love

I wanted to share some of our favorite books for children, including Jonathan's and my childhood favorites, the favorites from our daughters' early years, and the series we are reading to them now.

Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown. 

Hannah loved this book so much as a baby that we tracked down the companion book, My World. Both copies are now tattered and worn, having gone on many outings and adventures with us. Two other books by this author have captivated Natalie: Runaway Bunny and Home for a Bunny.

Curious George by Margret & H.A. Rey

 

Hannah's favorite toddler & preschool year books. I can't tell you how many times we've checked these yellow books out from the library. We even had a Curious George themed party for her 3rd birthday.

I believe the reason this series was such a favorite of Hannah's was due to the similarity between her personality and George's. For a while, I even described her as a "Curious George" as she got into lots of mischief, but by the end of the day she always made up for it.

Some books have become classic children's literature for a reason. Here are some big hits in our home:

Peter Rabbit & other stories by Beatrix Potter

The Velveteen Rabbit by Margery Williams

I have to admit this one has become more meaningful to me after having a child who loved a stuffed bunny as if it were real. Natalie & her Cinnamon Swirl Bunny are never far from one another. I also love this passage, since becoming well acquainted with joint pain:

 "Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But those things don't matter at all because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

The Complete Tales of Winnie the Pooh by A.A. Milne

Corduroy by Don Freeman

A little girl named Lisa falls in love with this teddy bear at a toy store. Published in 1968.

Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones

A fabulous way to introduce Jesus and the Bible to children. The author does a phenomenal job of carrying the prevailing theme of the Bible through every story in this book. A wonderful introduction to the heart of God.

Owl at Home - Arnold Lobel

This is just the most loveable owl. He makes tea out of his tears.

Mr. Putter & Tabby - Cynthia Rylant

Charming stories of an old man and his old cat. Some of the stories involve Mr. Putter's neighbor lady and her dog.

Chapter books I read and loved as a girl that we are now reading aloud to Hannah & Natalie:

All-of-a-Kind Family by Sydney Taylor



Five Jewish sisters living in New York in the early 20th century. Though poor, they find no shortage of adventures and happiness.

American Girl Books - {Molly, Samantha, Kaya, Kirsten, etc...} Assorted Authors including Valerie Tripp {not only do these stories portray girls of various ethnicities with good values and strong moral character, the realistic life plots give plenty of opportunity for teaching & discussion between parent and child, and help kids learn about historical periods.}

Betsy-Tacy books by Maud Hart Lovelace



The tales of little girls who meet at age 5 and become best friends. Published in the 1940s. 

The Boxcar Children by Gertrude Chandler Warner

These mysteries about 4 siblings are a generational hit in my family. My grandmother read them to my dad, my parents read them to me and my siblings, and now I have read them to my girls. These books captivated my imagination, probably in part due to how our family of 4 kids (two boys and two girls) was like the character siblings of the book. 

My favorite little girl book:

Baby Dear by Eloise Wilkin {a story about a little girl whose mother has a new baby. The little girl takes care of her dolly just as the mother takes care of the new baby.}

From the age of about 4, when my mom gave birth to twins, I couldn't wait to be a mother. My copy of this Little Golden Book was so well loved that the spine fell apart and my parents reinforced it with masking tape. When I was a teenager my mom and I found a new copy in the grocery store and bought it. 

Jonathan's favorite boyhood book:

Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak

What are some favorites from your childhood & in your home?

Using My Words

I have been focusing on the memoir I'm writing -- on loss, on love, on what makes a family -- and it has surprised me that the more words I use with my book writing, the less I seem to have for my journal or my blog. I keep coming back to this space, to say hello, or check in, and I just can't think what to say.

So hi and hello! I hope you are all well.

My husband celebrated a birthday last week and I had the pleasure of taking him out for a night. Here's a picture of us, taken in a mall parking lot, but reflecting happiness nonetheless.

We had dinner at Cheesecake Factory and got coffee at Starbucks and held hands and enjoyed hours with no sticky hands to wash or little bodies to buckle in and out of car seats. The girls had a great night having a sleepover at Grama and Papa's house.

I can't get over how blessed I am. Next month we are celebrating 9 years of marriage. I can't wait. I can't wait for that number to be double digits and then double and triple. 

I remember the longing to spend my life with someone, to be completely safe with another person. My husband is not perfect. I am not perfect. We are not perfect for each other. We are, in actuality, quite different. But I am safe with him. I know that I can tell him my dreams and my vision of the world and share my personal truths with him, and he will hold all of that safely.

This summer we're doing lots of reading around here, as all four of us are signed up for the local library's summer reading program. That means that, when I am not mothering and when I am not writing, I am reading. In one month I have read 6 + books and read several hours to the girls. 

We're definitely dripping with words around here, and we're not forgetting to use the ones we feel, like I love you. It's important not to assume that our family knows how we feel. Life is temporary. So we show and tell the love we feel, right now, while we can.

Are you using your words?