Sometimes after my family is asleep, I sit on the floor in my kitchen with only a small light above the oven to write by. I brew a cup of tea and set it beside me and uncap my pen and write. I think in ink, it's the best way for me to get at my truest thoughts and that's where the insights hide.

Sometimes the rain pours down outside the back door and I can hear the music that falls in sheets.

When I really have things to say, or I know I need to process or heal or grieve or be completely without distraction, this is my little ritual. Without distractions, I can write 3-5 pages before I get so uncomfortable I can't take it anymore. There's just enough light that I'm not tempted to do something else; the range light over my stove is like a spotlight reminding me of where I am to be and what I am to be doing.

It's in these late-night, dimly-lit moments that the answers come. Sometimes no answers, just peace. Sometimes no peace, but relief.


  1. What a beautiful picture... I used to do something similar with the Christmas tree a few years ago... couldn't sleep and the peace and soft lights helped put things in perspective...

  2. Carrie @ comfortedbyGod.blogspot.com
    Hi Jen! Im so glad the Lord introduced us. Thank you for following my blog; im following yours too. Im so very sorry to hear of your recent diagnosis of AS. Please feel free to email me-- I remember very clearly those early days of disbelief, questioning, and pain. My email is Carrie@comfortandcompassion.com. I truly look forward to hearing from you.

  3. just enough light that i'm not tempted to do something else... this too is why i leave the lights dim, if i see too much i'll be consumed by it, and won't let my heart,mind, body rest.


  4. I know how you love to write like that, and I'm so glad you're still able to do that! It is a very writerly thing to do.

  5. Thank you so much for this post, I just wanted to reach out and give you a hug. So beautifully written and describes the journaling process beautifully.


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