On Listening and Learning

"God has not only read your story, He wrote it."
Max Lucado

Over a year ago, God planted the seed of an idea in my heart. The idea to homeschool my daughters. While I've always known that I desired to be a mother, and that motherhood was, in fact, my greatest dream in life, I never thought I would homeschool.

When the idea began to take root and grow, I searched and searched for the origin. Where did it come from? I spoke with trusted people in my life, journaled and journaled and journaled about it, made lists of pros and cons, researched alternatives, researched curricula, and read books on homeschooling. I couldn't shake the idea that this was what I should do. 

After months of grappling, I finally made the decision to homeschool. This decision brought indescribable peace.

Shortly afterward, I was hit with my first major, unrelenting flare. I have not felt well for over a year now. Last summer was spent at multiple doctors' offices, having lab work done, waiting for results, waiting for consults. And shortly after we began our homeschool year, I was diagnosed with Ankylosing Spondylitis, a chronic inflammatory disease that attacks the spine and joints, often causing pain, fatigue, difficulty with mobility, and worse.

Homeschool has been different than I envisioned. It's difficult to be chronically ill with children, let alone be responsible for their education and attend to all of my other responsibilities. But the things I wanted -- reading together, encouraging a love of reading and creativity, prolonging childhood, having more quality time together -- are happening.

I believe God nudged me into homeschooling; that it was His will for our family. He knows the end from the beginning, so of course He knew when He began to nudge that I would get sick and that chronic illness would be a factor in this plan.

So I conclude that if He nudged and it was His plan and He knew I would develop Ankylosing Spondylitis, He also planned to provide what it required.

I don't write this to compare homeschooling with traditional schooling. The point is the reminder I've experienced: learn to listen. Looking back, I see that the best aspects of my life began with just a nudge.


  1. God's nudges are hard to ignore, and the peace found after we accept his leading is indescribable. We too are considering homeschooling our boys this next year, and as you said, we are weighing pros and cons, examining the why's behind it, etc. Thank you for your reminder to follow God's leading, even when we don't understand, and it may not make sense. It's what I needed to be reminded of. :)

  2. I admire your strength.. your children learn from parents and what a great teacher you are. Be well.

  3. What great perspective on your homeschool journey so far! Perfect illustrative photo as well. I think it's exciting that you can see the goals are being met, and your girls are thriving. That's always priceless.


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