As hard as I try to convince myself otherwise, there are going to be some days in which I can't succeed like I want to; success won't look like I envision. I won't be able to make my life look like what I think it should. It will be exhaustion and low-grade fever and pain that's hard to bear.
It will be a cottage full of Mama Bear and Baby Bears in pajamas at nearly 3 p.m.
That's chronic pain for you. That's chronic illness.
It will also be a chance to slow down that we wouldn't otherwise take; a chance to wear fuzzy pink slippers and bathrobes and pile into a big bed that's just the right size and read a big pile of storybooks.
It will be time to learn some Spanish. Time to discuss manners, sibling relationships, trying new foods, the science in the natural world.
It will be time for cuddling close -- for a 4 year-old head on my shoulder, and a 7 year-old hand, tanned brown from summer sun, resting on me.
It will be time slowed down.
And this evening when Papa Bear comes home from work, the house may not be clean, the table may have gone unused for schooling, but we will be calm and loving, and we will have learned and grown today, and we will be a little bit closer for this time we told to slow down and the hours we cuddled close and knit our hearts together.
Isn't that the success I envision?
I have a cold, so I'm not thinking clearly enough to craft a well-worded reply, but I really like how you've taken time to see your true priorities. That is success indeed! Love you!
ReplyDeleteI could not agree more. Prior to my injury and subsequent disease (Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy), I was a never-stop kind of mama. In talking to my physical therapist yesterday, she emphasized that I simply have to accept that I'll never be "that" kind of normal again, and instead, to celebrate the small victories of a day, even when they seem few.
ReplyDeleteIt seems that you've already found that balance for which I yearn to one day achieve. Kudos.
Balance? Oh friend, I'm still struggling with that too. It's a really fine line some days.
ReplyDeleteThank you Jennifer for giving us a peek into how you are learning to redefine "success."
ReplyDeleteBeautifully said Sweetie...and said from a beautiful heart.
ReplyDeletexo
Robin
All Things Heart and Home
You are perfect for your family. God gave them YOU for a reason. He crafted you with a purpose that no one else can fulfill. Thanks for sharing your day with us, fluffy pink slippers and all. Tres, tres fancy...
ReplyDeleteOh Shannon, thank you for your words.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Robin.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this perspective. I needed to read this tonight.
ReplyDelete{Hugs} to you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteI'm loving your perspective Jennifer. I was just thinking of this recently, how a day in my life is far from what I imagined it would be sometimes, but also blessed beyond what I would have thought it to be. You sound like you are doing an excellent job cultivating the hearts of your little ones. And that is success in the highest form! :) I love your blog and am so thankful to have found it! :)
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